Sunday, August 1, 2010

Awkward Sauce

Sometimes I don't know how I make friends. I make horrible first impressions.

New Guy: So, what are you doing with your life now that you've graduated?
Me: Well, I'm going to live in a commune and work on scriptwriting stuff. But really I just want to be a rock star.
New Guy: *laughs hysterically*
Me: You think I'm kidding, don't you?
New Guy: *keeps laughing* And don't we all just wanna be famous? *laugh laugh laugh laugh*
Me: *courtesy laugh*
*awkward silence*
New Guy: So you write things? What do you write?
Me: Right now I'm doing a lot of comedy sketches.
New Guy: Oh? Wait, so you're funny?

Ack. That conversation is right up there with my old boss constantly saying things like, "It's so cool how underground your band is. Like, I've never heard of them, ever. In fact, I didn't even know you were in a band until you told me you were in a band! That's so cool." So full of fail.

Anyway, that concludes today's dose of Adventures in Awkward Lauren Land. Will be out of town for a few days, so if the blogosphere lacks my love, fear not! I shall return triumphantly at the end of the week.

Till then, if you need to/want to get a hold of me, you can always shoot me an email over at I'm one of those obnoxious iPhone users that can pick up email anywhere. So yeah. *switches to fake French accent ala Mal from "Inception"* You know how to find me! You know what to do!

Over and out, friends.


  1. Awe! I will miss you while you're gone.

  2. I'm kind of glad I missed a few of your last posts... now I can use them to fill the time.
    I was told that Portland is a place where white artistic people are ACTUALLY poor. Is that accurate?


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