Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Not So Hippy Dippy After All

I recently had a profound realization:

I am not a hippy.

Yes, I believe in peace and love. I live in a commune. I just had feathers attached to my head as hair extensions (see picture). I dream of making the world a better place through music. It bothers me when people don't recycle. I own the original Broadway recording of "Hair." I have friends of all ages and I identify these friends by the type of art that they make. I've participated in a Solstice celebration. I think that reading Walt Whitman aloud by candlelight is a legitimately fun group activity.

But I am not really a hippy.

I have no interest in growing my own vegetables. I am okay with shopping at grocery stores. I enjoy eating meat. I have nothing against the organic movement, but I'm never going to sit and complain about artificial flavors in my ice cream. I have a deep respect for woman who don't shave their armpits, but I personally need to on a regular basis. I believe in feminism (to a certain extent), but I also believe in wearing a bra.

I have no desire to ever be openly naked among others. I never want to go to Burning Man. I'm not into drugs. The constant smell of marijuana gives me a headache. Though I sometimes look at my horoscope in the paper, I don't make assumptions about people based on astrological signs. I have never practiced any Eastern religions.

I own multiple fur coats. I drink a latte at Starbucks occasionally. Daily bathing is important to me. I hate camping. I could never live in the woods. When there is a spider in my room, I mercilessly kill it. Sometimes, I listen to totally processed, auto-tuned pop music. Sometimes, I disregard the fact that cars are hard on the environment and I drive to a place that is close enough to walk.

Six months ago, I packed up my life and naively moved into this "artistic community." Six months later, I feel like everything has changed completely but I know that isn't true. I am still Lauren. It just so happens that this year's model of Lauren comes equipped with a love of granola and a fear of brownies.

At least I have finally recognized this simple truth: I will never be an actual hippy.

But that's really okay.

I guess it's time to face reality and get a job of some sort. Hmmfph.

9 comments:

  1. wish I cud say something to make u feel any better!

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  2. I love eating meat and and hate camping too! I also need daily showers and have to shave. I could never be a hippy either.

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  3. Did you ever get that job at the restaurant you applied for?

    I'm not a hippy either, but I DO love granola. And, for the record, your feathers are hawt.

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  4. It's okay to reboot, redesign and update as many times as needed. Apple does it constantly. Living many lives before you depart makes you that much more interesting a soul.

    But don't fear the brownies. Not all of them, anyway.

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  5. I think it all depends on how one defines "hippy."

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  6. I think you could be defined as a "hippie at heart" just not 100% authentic hippie.

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  7. This is why defining people doesn't work.

    Jobs aren't so bad. I have three and I just had two days off.

    Oh wait, I quit one. I have two. Man is it hard to keep track. See, you can be a hippie with a job (or two)!

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  8. I know what you mean... I'll never be a true hippie either. I'm like "imitation crab"... only it's "imitation hippie". =[

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  9. I could never be a hippie either.

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