Oh man. I'm currently at Peets Coffee inhaling a pumpkin spice latte and it's the best coffee-related drink I've had in ages. It officially feels like Fall now. It's weird to think that just last week there was a major heat wave. The air has shifted since then and that distinctive Fall smell has returned. The infamous Portland rain has made a few cameos in the weather report and I've even felt the need to wear sweaters a couple of times.
Personally, I'm glad it's fall again. I'm a true Oregonian in that I secretly hate sunshine and live for a good gloomy overcast day. And I would always rather be too cold than too hot (because really, you can always put on more clothes to warm up when it's cold but can you only take off so many clothes to cool down when it's hot), so breaking out my long sleeved shirts again was sort of exciting.
Also, Fall is by far my favorite of all the seasons. Winter is too depressing, Spring is too optimistic, and Summer is just too darn hot and frankly overrated. But Fall contains a sort of delicate beauty that makes me want to drink too many lattes and write bad poetry about leaves or something.
Fall does bring a certain element of nostalgia along. Maybe it's one of the things that is packaged in that crisp autumn air. It's undoubtedly a season of change, but it's also a season with a distinct set of memories.
This year seems especially nostalgic. A year ago, I was getting ready to move to the city and live with a bunch of wacky artists. I was meeting everyone for the first time. I was building friendships, making alliances, learning who to watch out for, and feeling completely accepted and supported as a creative individual.
A year later, I'm still here, existing in this big bohemian mad house made of brick. And it's been quite the year - I think I have enough material for one thousand sitcom episodes and a few feature films. But the times are changing. People are changing. People are leaving. I keep saying I want to leave too but I don't know where I want to go.
We had The First Of The Last Suppers last night in the courtyard. It started at dusk and we lit everything with candlelit. It was a good night but slightly strange. A handful of my favorite people are sticking around until they develop better plans, but many people are fleeing on October 1st.
The Chef is moving to Finland. He was my first friend here and is one of the most unique people I've ever met. I think I'm in denial over the fact that he's leaving. I'll still have The Fonz, The Poet, and The Mad Scientist (who's been coming out of his room more often and gracing us with his lovably odd personality), but none of them are going to stick train whistles in an air mattress or organize community Solstice celebrations.
And, of course, no one else is going to get drunk and sing "One Night In Bangkok" while spontaneously yanking on The Poet's nipples. Yes, that is a moment that happened last night and yes, i am still laughing about it.
But I digress. A bunch of other people on the third floor are moving too. It's a mass exodus, I guess. Feels like the end of summer camp, actually. You know, it's emotional and seems unfair and you don't want to move on from the fun you had in the woods, but you know deep down that you need to join the real world again and you look forward to bathrooms with running water.
I'll be honest and say that I don't always like change. But I guess that's just something that often comes with Fall.
I am always a bit sad in the fall now that I'm not a student. I see the summer students at my work all leave to go back and I wish I was them. I wish I was buying new pens and packing my stuff again. People come and go and I feel like I just stay.
ReplyDeleteI'm beginning to feel like that too. I never even really liked school, but now that I'm in the "real world" I miss buying school supplies and plotting my outfit for the first day.
ReplyDeleteThere is a certain sadness about fall. Wasn't the TASG born out of a whole wave of angst that happened in autumn? Haha. Excited to start that up again, btw.
It's sad that everything is changing and people are moving out, but that just means you'll have a whole new set of experiences waiting for you. I felt this way when I had to leave England after living there a year, but it was also good. Change is good.
ReplyDeleteI love Fall so much, because of Halloween and October is my birth month. I love the leaves falling and crunching them on the sidewalk, and the pleasantly brisk scent that fills the air. Wish I had a pumpkin spice latte right now :)
Yes it was! We need to get Tom excited! Summer's over - let's bitch about life again!
ReplyDeleteI think I thrive on change. Whether it's rearranging my bedroom every 3 months or moving to a new city every 3 years. At the same time, though, it's hard starting over. But like the seasons, things just move along.
ReplyDeleteThe fall is my favourite season as well.
ReplyDeleteChange for me is something I need. When I don't change even my room around at least once every two months, I start to get stressed just for the sake of being stressed.
So sad to hear the Chef is leaving. I hope you figure out where it is that you want to go soon enough.